Hard As Snails 10k Race Report - Cripples day out

I will state this now. This weekend was probably the most painful weekend I've ever had!!

Starting on Friday evening and after a home made curry, myself and eatingtrees made our way to the pub for a bottle of beer or two. It should have sent out signals that when we were walking back (not late I might add) with me limping on one side because on a pain in the hamstring and shin and eatingtrees' calf being extremely tight, that we weren't in the best state to attempt the hills but despite this, I was looking forward to it. It would be a different kind of race than I'd done before and judging by the hills, it'd be a tough challange.

I HAD A SUSPICION I MAY BE SEEING THESE GUYS LATER

We weren't wrong! That, without doubt, was the toughest race I have ever done and the only one I've ever had to walk some of! I wanted to stop, curl up in a ball and be left to rot next to a tree after 3k. Mind you, even that wouldn't have been possible as I'd have only rolled down the bloody hills again! Those first 3k were just so calf tightening it was untrue. I just didn't realise the extent to which you use different muscles (or the same muscles differently) when running up hills. I'd always run shorter, sharper hills and not these long and steep killers. I just couldn't get my mind focussed on anything other than the pain and not from injuries for once.

AFTER THE 3KM OF HILLS, THIS IS THE VIEW. EATINGTREES HEADING FOR THE FIRST BIG DESCENT

The next K was pretty much all downhill (albeit in sand) which we picked up the pace a bit and rested our weary legs on the way and then the 4km mark appeared. And we turned. Eatingtrees took the camera and this is what lay ahead!!

ME ATTEMPTING TO RUN THE FIRST FEW STEPS OF THIS INCLINE. IT DIDN'T LAST

This now made it a long walk although many of the people attempting to run were doing so at the same pace as we were walking so it seemed a good idea. We got to the water point (5k mark), then headed downhill into the forest. This was purely an attempt to stay on your feet as I have to be honest, I'd take it easy even if I was walking down this bit. We then reached the 1km incline that we'd come down previously. Remember the sand? Even worse trying to go up it. You get absolutely nowhere!

We finally made it to the top and heard some lovely words. 'Pretty much all downhill from here' said one of the marshalls. He was mostly right but by then I considered stepping over a tree stump an incline so I still was able to hate the last 3km too. It was pretty painful but you couldn't lose concentration because you'd end up eating mud, bark and sand as you hit the floor. Some specators who'd finished around 3 days before us shouted 'only 200m to go' which made me lose my concentration, go over slightly on my ankle and then release the worlds biggest torrent of 'colourful' language ever! I managed to stumble in the direction of eatingtrees' shoulder which kept me upright and we both heading for the line using what can only be described as a hobbling limp sprint. Timings were dubious but together with eatingtrees we clocked it around 1:07:22. That's nearly 16mins above my PB which says it all really.

So then. Painful, mentally tough, horrible surface and my worst ever result. Will I do it next year??? Yeah probably, it'd be rude not to!

What I won't be doing next year is moving house straight after. 2 days of heavy lifting and lots of stairs. My legs, back and shoulders haven't ached so much in a long, long, time. Luckily, I managed to bribe, beg and borrow the services of eatingtrees on the Saturday afternoon and evening to help with the heavy lifting and I'll state this now. Sir, you are a true gentleman and we couldn't have done it without you. Thank you.